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David: A Man After God’s Own Heart! – Friends in Need Grace to you and peace from God our Father, and our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ, AMEN Main Theme: This summer we will study the amazing story of David – a shepherd boy who became King! Today, in our 10th and final week, we explore the role of friends in helping us deal with life in a broken world. Friends are like “sheltering trees” and we find God touched David thropugh different friends – including 1) Ittai, 2) Zadok and Abiathar, 3) Hushai, 4) Shobe , Machir, and Barzilla, and 5) Joab. David’s story helps us discover this about friends: 1) Friends are not optional; they’re essential, 2) friends are not automatic; they must be cultivated, 3) friends are not neutral; they impact our lives, and 4) friendships ome in varying degrees; some of whom play more significant roles in our life than others. Even Kings need friends – ad did Jesus when He walked this earth! We need God to show us how to make and cultivate friends too! (Based on Chuck Swindoll’s book “David” and other research.) 1) A SHELTERING TREE! A “sheltering tree!” That’s the description a poet once wrote to describe what friends are: a sheltering tree! As a kid, I lived in trees! My favorites were the huge oak trees found in Georgia that stood alone in the hot fields and protected us from the sun’s heat, embraced us in their outstretched arms, begging for a tree fort to be built in them, or a rope swing to encourage us to fly! A sheltering tree is a great description for a friend! And yet as wonderful as friendship sounds, many in our culture still don’t have many friends, or don’t know how to go about making them. In fact, intimate friends are rare in today’s busy and fast paced world. How sad! So vital to our existence is “friendship” that William Blake once wrote: “The bird - a nest, the spider - a web, the human - friendship.” God never designed us to be anything but social animals – and friendships are a desired part of His plan. We ALL need sheltering trees! After all, Jesus had many friends when He walked this earth, and King David apparently did too! 2) NEEDED: FRIEND! In fact, if anybody NEEDED a sheltering tree, a friend – it was David! Let’s review: his life was a mess! PERSONALLY he had acquired a harem of concubines and wives, (against God’s wishes), had an adulterous affair with Bathsheba, murdered her husband to cover-up their sin, and was smothered in guilt and shame! DOMESTICALLY, his home was shattered. His lack of parenting skills had led to bitterness, incest, rape, rebellion, and murder among his now grown up children. POLITICALLY, David had lost his respect and authority as the leader of Israel. The lowest point transpired when his son Absalom conspired to take over his father’s kingdom. We discovered that Absalom had deviously stolen the hearts of the people of Israel through lies and deception. As David packed his bags to flee from his son’s armies, there must have been pandemonium in the palace as people loyal to David scrambled to grab what they could and then run for their lives. The great King David, now betrayed, broken, and deeply hurt, was about to return again to the “wilderness” he once roamed as a young man fleeing from King Saul. If ever there was a man who needed a friend – a sheltering tree – it was David! 3) NOT ALONE! It must have touched David’s heart to see that in his time of need, he was not alone. (2nd Samuel 15:15-16) “The king’s officials answered him, ‘Your servants are ready to do whatever our lord the king chooses.’ The king set out, with his entire household following him… and they halted at a place some distance away.” At the last house David stopped to look back at the city named after him – The City of David. As the dependant crowd hurried by, leading pack animals, and carrying supplies – his sadness must have been overwhelming. Where there any “trees” to give him shelter? That is, …any true friends? …any one to walk the lonely road of despair with? Was there anyone to affirm him and give him hope? With so many jumping ship and defecting to the side of Absalom, were there any loyal and sheltering trees? Yes! David was not alone! God provided 5 sets of friends - and yet, many Christians have never heard their names before. 4) ITTAI! We read about the first in 2nd Samuel 15:18-20 “All his men marched past him, along with all the Kerethites and Pelethites; and all six hundred Gittites who had accompanied him from Gath marched before the king. The king said to Ittai the Gittite, “Why should you come along with us? Go back and stay with King Absalom. You are a foreigner, an exile from your homeland. You came only yesterday. And today shall I make you wander about with us, when I do not know where I am going? Go back and take your countrymen. May kindness and faithfulness be with you.” Ittai has never been mentioned before, …until now – when the chips are down. 5) LOYAL FRIEND! Imagine – a loyal friend from Gath. Remember, “Gath” was the home of Goliath (the giant), and the Philistine enemies of Israel! Ironically, David once fled there and pretended to be a traitor to Israel because King Saul was chasing him. But instead of hating David, some Philistines fell in love with him! So they followed him when he went back home to be King, and now they “have his back” when it’s up against the wall. Ittai reveals the depth of his friendship (vs 21) when he says to David, “As the Lord lives, and as my lord the king lives, surely where the king may be, whether for death or for life, there also your servant will be.” That is a friend! When everything else fails and everybody else has turned away, there are precious few that stick like glue! “I’m with you partner! I’m there for you! Up or down, I’m by your side. Day or night – call me, and you’ll never walk alone!” In this case, a man (once David’s enemy) is now a loyal friend! 6) ZADOK AND ABIATHAR! The next friends in line are Zadok and Abiathar, (2nd Samuel 15:23-24) “The whole countryside wept aloud as all the people passed by. The king also crossed the Kidron Valley, and all the people moved toward the desert. Zadok was there, too, and all the Levites who were with him were carrying the ark of the covenant of God. They set down the ark of God, and Abiathar offered sacrifices until all the people had finished leaving the city.” In other words, his two clergy friends looked at David and said “So where to David? We’re with you – just show us the way!” But David was a man after God’s own heart and he knows the ark does not belong to him and he tells his minister friends to take the ark back to Jerusalem, and go about God’s work until he returns! Zadok and Abiathar are needed to keep Israel’s spiritual focus on God! 7) A BLESSING! Sometimes, when we are really in need, we need a few friends who will say to you, “How can I help? I’ll do whatever you wish. How can I be a blessing? I’m available!” If going back to Jerusalem is where David thinks they will be of best use to him, then they’re off to return to Jerusalem with the ark. There are risks that they may get beat up or killed by Absalom, but if their friend needs them in the city – that’s where they’re gonna be! I don’t know about you – but to have friends like that – that would be a blessing! 8) HUSHAI! We meet the next friend when David got to the Mount of Olives and climbed it to pray, crying all the way! Everyone who was with him, followed him, and they too cried together. We’re told, “When David arrived at the summit, where people used to worship God, Hushai the Arkite was there to meet him, his robe torn and dust on his head.” (2nd Samuel 15: 30) Who is Hushai? Verse 37 simply tells us that he was “David’s friend.” The torn clothes, the dust, was symbolic that Hushai has entered into David’s mourning! These are marks of compassionate feeling for David! The king’s pain is now his pain! Sometimes when our suffering is “more than we can bear” – someone comes along and carries it with us. No speeches, just an embrace that says they are there for you! They do not quote scripture, or preach a sermon – they offer no flowery prayers! But the hug they give tells it all! Like Hushai, they share in your pain, help carry the load, and You know you have a friend – and that gives you hope! 9) RISKS! David decides to give his loyal friend a serious but risky task – (2nd Samuel 15:34) “…if you return to the city and say to Absalom, ‘I will be your servant, O King; I was your father’s servant in the past, but now I will be your servant’, then you can help me in frustrating Ahithophel’s advise.” (Ahithophel was the advisor that talked Absalom into cohabitating with all the ex-kings wives to prove his kingship and power to Israel.) So David is saying, “Hushai – I need a spy in Absalom’s camp – someone who get information to the priests Zadok and Abiathar – who will send their sons with the messages to me in the wilderness.” David’s military strategy apparently works even in the midst of a broken heart – and will prove very useful in the months to come as David works to over throw Absalom and regain his crown! When you are exposed and vulnerable – it is good to have sheltering trees to embrace you and give you hope! It is good to have friends willing to take risks for you and work to heal your wounds and restore your life! 10) SMB’S! The fourth “set of trees” to shelter David are Shobi, Machir, and Barzilla. (2nd Samuel 17:27 “When David came to Mahanaim, …Shobe… Machir… and Barzilla (I’ll call this group SMB) …brought wheat and barley, flour and roasted grain, beans and lentils, honey and curds, sheep, and cheese from cow’s milk for David and his people to eat. For they said, “The people have become hungry and tired and thirsty in the desert.” Whenever you and I are in a “wilderness moment” in life – our SMB’s KNOW when we are hungry, thirsty, and weary! They bring the casserole at just the right time, mow the lawn, baby-sit the kids to give you rest. They don’t ask for thanks, or need applause. To them it’s no big deal. That’s what “faithful-to-the-end friends” are all about! SMB’s come to take care of our physical and emotional needs! 11) JOAB! And finally, as we learned last week, David’s soldiers, led by Joab, and Absalom’s met in battle! And David’s rebellious son Absalom was killed. David’s grief was tremendous! What we didn’t learn last week was that David became so absorbed in his own grief that he sunk into a great depression. It’s like falling into a dungeon that is locked from the outside, and you can’t get out of it on your own. What is needed in a situation like this is a friend that breaks down the door of that dungeon of despair and hauls your weary butt BACK into the light of the day! You need a friend like Joab. Someone who will care enough to confront you! 12) FRIENDS CONFRONT! While David mopes in his aloneness and grief – his friend Joab confronts him with some hard cold truth! Fact is, the King’s men have fought and died for him, and they expect the King to help them celebrate their victory! Instead, they feel forgotten by their King who is lost in his grief. (2nd Samuel 19:5-7) So… “…Joab went into the house to the king and said, ‘Today you have humiliated all your men who have just saved your life and the lives of your sons and daughters and the lives of your wives and concubines. You love those who hate you and hate those who love you. You have made it clear today that the commanders and their men mean nothing to you. I see that you would be pleased if Absalom were alive today and all of us were dead. Now go out and encourage your men. I swear by the lord that if you don’t go out, not a man will be left by nightfall. This will be worse for you than all the calamities that have come upon you from your youth until now.” Ouch! Having a friend can hurt sometimes! But each of us need true friends who care enough to confront us with the truth! In this case, David heard his friend and did the right thing by going to the city gate and encouraging his people! Friends don’t let friends continue to make bigger and bigger mistakes if they can help it! Love confronts! 13) TRUE FRIENDSHIP! David has a small forest of sheltering trees – that is, friends! Chuck Swindoll says there are 4 things to learn about true friendship: First, 1) friends are not optional; they are essential! Computers, Television, Music… none of these things are substitutes for friends. We all need someone to care, to listen, to comfort, and yes… to confront us when we screw up! Zora Neale Hurston once said: It seems to me that trying to live without friends is like milking a bear to get cream for your morning coffee. It is a whole lot of trouble, and then not worth much after you get it. It’s true: as frustrating as friends can be on occasion, trying to live without them is like trying to live without oxygen – eventually we fade away without friends! They are not optional; they are essential! Secondly, 2) Friends are not automatic; they must be cultivated. Samuel Johnson said, “One should keep his friendship in a constant repair.” Or consider: “Friendships are fragile things, and require as much handling as any other fragile and precious things." (Randolph S. Bourne). If you don’t work at it – friendships can fade away. Ralph Waldo Emerson said, “The only way to have a friend is to be one.” No, friendship is not automatic; it needs cultivation! Thirdly, 3) Friends are not neutral; they impact your life! If your friends lead good lives, they will encourage you to be a better person! If they do not lead a good life… well, the consequences can be devastating to you as they lead you down the wrong path. 1st Corinthians 15:33 says, “Do not be misled: ‘Bad company corrupts good character.’” We need to choose our friends wisely – because friends are not neutral; they impact your life! And lastly, 4) Friendships come in varying degrees, some of whom play more significant roles in our life than others;
14) GOD’S PLAN! Now all these “levels” of friendship are important, but none more important than the last! Do you have at least one intimate friend with whom you can be completely open and honest? Do you have anyone who offers you support and encouragement, and yes; hard truths and confrontation? See, it is in God’s plan that we all have sheltering trees! …intimate friends!! 15) WONDERFUL AND DIVINE! Thankfully David had a grove of sheltering trees - helping him make it through the toughest and loneliest hours of his life. God provided them! And friends are treasures we all need! Treasures wonderful and divine! If you HAVE them, David’s story should remind us to give thanks for them and encourages us to keep watering them! If you’re like many who are busy but lonely, and lacking true intimate friendships – then it’s time today to prayerfully ask Jesus to help you plant a few! How do you do that? It’s no secret – study what Jesus does, and duplicate it! Give yourself away selflessly! You discover you have friends because you become a loving friend! But becoming Christ-like is not an automatic process; God’s children need to be intentional about it! We need to ask the Holy Spirit into our hearts to do what we cannot do for ourselves: be other centered! It takes spiritual passion, wisdom, and love to accept and care for imperfect and broken human beings. But the advantages are wonderful and divine! 16) SILVER AND GOLD! Like David, we all need “sheltering trees”, …and to become sheltering trees. Every new face that walks through our church’s door, every co-worker, school mate, and neighbor… needs a “sheltering tree”. And when you ask Christ to transform you into just that (a friend) – blessings flow down, and into your life! Friends are one of the ways “God does God to us!” So let us treasure our old friendships, and always seek out new ones! As the Girl Scouts say: "Make new friends and keep the old, one is silver and the other gold". 17) FRIENDS! Friends, you will never be without a divine friend in Jesus Christ – that’s a given! No tree shelters us like our Lord! But with the Spirit’s help, we too can stand tall in the hot fields and protect others from the elements that tear us down! With Christ living within us, we can embrace others in our outstretched arms, (like the branch limbs of a great oak tree offer shelter to the creatures of the fields.) And when worldly storms attack us – the old hymn reminds us: what a friend we have in Jesus! But notice; one of the many ways He desires to share His love and blessings – is through friends! Praise God! AMEN Sermon/Confessional Prayer: Dear Heavenly Father, we confess that in our busy and complicated lives, we have not always focused on our friends or becoming one. In fact, we have even taken our friendship with you for granted. We have forgotten that friendships are a divine gift and have to be constantly cultivated. We have forgotten to treasure old friendships and seek new ones! We have filled the void with television, entertainment, and work. Forgive us God and empower us to be intentional about making and growing friendships that bless! Lord, David was blessed to have friends that got him through the tough times. Help us to remember that friends are often a way by which you bless us with love and care. Forgive us when we neglect our friends, or look at friendship as consumers only. Inspire us to pour ourselves out for others as you have poured yourself out for us. Teach us to be grateful for existing friendships, and enable us to be generous by being a new friend to others who need someone to listen, care for, and encourage them through this journey in life. And now Lord, although you know us better than we know ourselves, listen as we share in a moment of silence, those other parts of our lives that need to be forgiven, washed clean, healed, and recommitted to you! (made anew.) (Silence) Lord, like your servant David, we rejoice in caring relationships and the depth and fulfillment they bring. Thank you for reminding us that in order to have friends, we need first to be one! Help us to reflect the caring, sacrifice, and love that you have shown us in our divine and holy friendship with you! In Jesus Name We Pray. AMEN Assurance of Forgiveness: Friends, listen to the good news: The Lord, who is your greatest friend, …that Lord has mercifully heard your confession and eagerly forgives you all your sins. Go now, and remember: The best friends are merely conduits for God’s love! So… in Christ-like ways, make new friends and keep the old, one is silver and the other gold. And let’s not forget – What a friend we have in Jesus! Praise God! AMEN Opening prayer: Dear Heavenly Father, this week we journeyed once again through a world filled with people. Broken people. Lonely people. People who could use a friend. And so we count our blessings now, because in this place we find the greatest friend of all – you! We are reminded that when the world causes us to stumble and fall, you lift us up. When our sins place us in bondage, you graciously forgive and free us once again. When we need guidance and direction in our lives, your counsel is pure and trustworthy! When we are spiritually, emotionally, and physically wounded, you rush to heal us! You know everything about us, and yet you choose to love us anyway! Lord, the world needs more human friends who will lead others in need to you, to receive what we often take for granted: a divine friendship based on love and caring! Because you did not design us to walk alone, transform us now, in this hour, that we may begin to develop more Christ-like friendships in our daily routines. Teach us not only to be grateful for old friends, but inspire us to seek out new friends too. Empower us that we may reach out in sacrificial ways so that all may come to experience what a friend we have in Jesus! In Jesus Name We Pray! AMEN! |
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